Recently I dated someone who snored. It was the first time I’d ever dated anyone who snored so voraciously and consistently all night long that I could not even sleep through it. And to make matters worse, he snored in every position! All night long I would lie next to him, resentful and angry, while he slept peacefully rattling the house.  Then he’d...

On the eve of my 29th birthday, on a beautiful, sunny Sunday afternoon, I ran into my ex boyfriend, this wife and his baby. Need a minute? Yeah, so did I, but I didn’t get one. What I got instead, was an introduction to my ex boyfriend’s fucking baby. Her name is Lexi and she’s really good at sleeping. I know this because his wife Marissa told me....

My favorite thing to do in Vermont is to go to the Price Chopper grocery store. I’ve started going there for everything. Sometimes I go even when I only need one thing that I could easily get from the corner store. Every chance I get, I’m there looking lost and acting helpless, so the cute, young boys who work there will come to my rescue. I know...

I woke up yesterday morning with a pounding headache in a bed that wasn’t mine. My first thought after acknowledging the pain was about the car. I’m using my mom’s and I remembered she had arranged to get it inspected at 7:30 that morning. It was definitely too late for that. My second thought was about the person lying next to me. I lingered on...

Phone rings. Me: “Hello, One More Time!” Young Man: “Hi, do you have mens leather jackets?” Me: “Yup. What size are you looking for?” Young Man: “Uhhh. Ummmm. Hey, what size am I?” he asked, his voice pointed away from the phone. A woman responded in the background: “You’re a medium!” Young Man: “Uh, I’m a medium, if that means anything to...